Shut The Hell Up

I am on the fifteenth floor – half way to the top.  I can feel my heart pounding and my breath is coming in shallow bursts.  I stop briefly to wipe a bead of sweat away from my eyes.  Then I push on, climbing the stairs.  

My legs ache.  My back hurts.  I can hardly breathe. Gotta keep going.  Gotta keep going.  I tell myself.

Last year at this time, I had never heard of “Tower Climbing.”   Now I was a week away from my first race. At this time next week, I’ll be standing o the top of the AON building in Chicago, eighty flights about the city. At least I hope I will.  

I don’t expect to win the race.  I don’t expect to place.  I barely expect to show.  My goal is simple.  I merely want to make it to the top – eighty flights of stairs. Sounds crazy?  That’s what I thought too.  But I had a very good reason.  Let me explain.

I climbed to the top of Watterson, a twenty nine floor building, for the first time in August.  It went something like this. 

Flight One:

Me: Did you say twenty-nine flights of stairs? Wow.  I wonder if I can do this.

My negative subconscious: Probably not, let’s go home and take a nap.

Me:  Just one more flight.

Flight ten:

Me: My legs are starting to hurt.  I sure am breathing hard.

My negative subconscious:  This is too hard.  Let’s turn around.  I think I saw a McDonald’s down the block.

Me:  Just one more flight.

Flight fifteen:

Me:  So tired.  Half way.  Huff Huff.  Half way there.

My negative subconscious:  Seriously, this is ridiculous.  How about we call it a day? 

Me:  Just one more flight.

Flight twenty two:

Me: Almost there.  Almost there.

My negative subconscious:  My legs hurt.  I can’t breathe.  What the hell are we doing?

Me:  Just one more flight.

Flight twenty nine:

Me: Made it.  The top.  I did it.

My negative subconscious:  Great.  Are you happy now?  Can we go home and promise never to do this again?

Me: Just one more time.

So why will I be climbing eighty flights to the top of the AON building next week? I won’t be doing it to win the race.  I won’t be doing it to place.  I won’t even be doing it to show.  I’ll just be doing it so that I can finally tell my negative subconscious to shut the hell up.