Happily Ever After

What’s Your Story?

In a few days, my nephew Daniel will graduate from high school. Dan is a smart kid who works hard and who has a big heart. Instead of spending his final days of his senior year attending parties, Dan will be on his way to Haiti to help restore the lives of those impacted by the earthquake from earlier this year.

In my blog today, I offer some advice to Dan as he officially enters the world of adults.

Dear Daniel:

Once upon a time there was a boy.

In a few days, you will graduate. A few weeks after that, you’ll leave home and go to college.

I remember the day you were born. It was a snowy March day and the roads were slick. I remember when you were a toddler with a bright smile. You enjoyed playing with matchbox cars and building things. You wore warm footy jammies to bed and fell asleep hugging your cookie monster.

Like most small boys, you loved stories. Your mom read to you about Thomas the Train. She read to you about trucks and cars. She read, “I Love You Forever”.

Children thrive on stories. Stories are powerful. They evoke compelling memories and teach important lessons. Some stick with us for years.

Once upon a time there was a boy.

Stories aren’t just fiction and fantasy. They are not just dreams and wishes. Every day is a story. Every person is a story. Your Mom is a story. Your Dad is a story. You are a story.

The move from student to adult is the perfect time to assess your story. To look at yourself and say “What is My Story? What Story Do I Want to Be? And How Can I Make Someone Else’s Story Better.”

Once upon a time there was a boy.

So, what is your story? Is it a list of where you were born, where you grew up, what you did? No, that’s your resume, your history. Its not your story. Real stories aren’t about what happened. Real stories are about “why did it happen this way.”

Think Star Wars. What’s the story? Boy meets droid. Boy has an adventure. Boy defeats the death star. No, that would be boring because the recited facts are nothing more than history.

But Star Wars wasn’t boring. That’s because Star Wars wasn’t about the facts and the events. The real story was about Good versus Evil. Freedom versus Imprisonment. Love versus Hate. That’s what made it compelling.

Like Star Wars, your story is complex. Because your real story isn’t about where you were born, where you live or where you are going. Your real story is about your values.

Your values define your story. Be honest. Choose to do the right thing. Be a person that others want to emulate. That is your story.

Once upon a time there was a boy.

Don’t stop with knowing your values. Instead, ask, “What do I want my story to be.”

Do you want to be a famous pilot? Do you want to live humbly and simply? The story you will become is up to you.

You have the power to shape your story. First, by dreaming big. Second by surrounding yourself with other people who share your dreams.

Great stories are not written on small dreams. They are written on yearnings that are larger than life.

You can desire things that are bigger than you, things that seem impossible. The higher your goals, the more likely you are to write a great story.

Great stories are not written about one character. Every great story contains a multitude of supporting characters. The friends who help the hero be bigger and better than himself. The people who spur him on. The Ron Weasleys. The Hermione Grangers. The Albus Dumbledores. The people who help make Harry Potter great.

Pick your friends carefully. Choose to be influenced by those we are good. Learn from those who dare to dream good dreams. Find people who are smarter than you are, more successful than you are, stronger than you, happier than you, better than you. Find people who share your values. Find people who share your dreams. Be with them.

Once upon a time there was a boy.

When you think you know what you want your story to be, remember this. In every great epic adventure, the ultimate success of the hero wasn’t what he did for himself. It was what he did for someone else. Great stories teach us not to spend our life trying to make our own story great. They teach us to make someone else’s story better.

It's Charlotte giving her life to save Wilbur. It's Superman saving the world. Because life’s greatest question isn’t how you can succeed. It’s how you can be useful to others.

Be useful. When you dream, dream beyond your own wants. Dream for those who have lost their dreams.

Once upon a time there was a boy who did great things.

Your story is being written. You have the power to decide what the next chapter will say. You have the power to make someone else's story better. You have the power to create your own “Happily ever after.”